time for a serious one

 After awhile you start figuring out that the things we did in High School don't and shouldn't carry on through out the rest of our lives. I'm 21 I've been out of High School as long as I was in it. I was never perfect, I made choices that were not the best for me but were convenient and temporarily distracting from reality. I hurt people. I was selfish. I even made mistakes after Dahlia was born, nothing that would effect my daughter directly but things that I did made scars on my relationships. I am so happy that I have a husband I can be open and honest with. Have I made him mad? pssh absolutely, and it goes both ways. In the past few weeks we have emptied our pasts baggage fully. It's a weight lifted, since there is now nothing he doesn't know and nothing I don't know.  Things that happened before we knew each other, mistakes we made with each other, and pain we've cause to each other by choices we've made.
 When we got married, we did it because we knew we were supposed to be together. Not because we had a child, or because we had been together so long. But because we love each other, and knew we would never want to marry or have a relationship with anyone else. We don't want to share ourselves completely or been "seen" by anyone but each other. 

He doesn't just have my body, or my heart, he has my mind. 

Most married women will understand that. It's meaningful in so many different ways. When you can look at your spouse and know that they know who you are, really, that's a powerful thing. Love can't be forced or substituted. That's what makes it special. 

 If you live your life searching, but keep another person strung along you will never find real love and they won't either. Some of us probably did that in High School luckily we grow from that and stop, maybe some of you are doing it right now and I hope you see that you're holding you and someone else back. I had to let go of a part of my life, to truly give myself Kyle. In turn he had to stop searching, and see me clearly to know the love I had for him is irreplacable. & I am so happy he did. I will never ask for perfection again, just honesty.